Christmas 2022

We really had no idea how this Christmas would play out and in the end, it was much better than expected because I had very little expectations. I told the kids the times of the different events, church services, dinner, present opening, and then left it up to them. Ingrid chose to join us for the afternoon church service at Desert Springs, go to our annual Chinese dinner, go back to our house for desert and traditional pj opening, and spent most of Christmas Day with us. Juan chose to boycott Christmas all together. He went to church alone and opened his presents on Christmas night alone. He worked on Christmas Day. His excuse was it is too painful to be a part of things the way they are now. It is his choice. He has a loving, supportive family that he chooses to not engage with. We did get to zoom with Angie, Dougie, and Mariana. Mariana will be two in March and is growing up so fast!

Christmas cookies

We invited Ingrid and her boyfriend Jayden over for dinner and to decorate Christmas cookies. We thought this would be a good opportunity to get to know Jayden and spend some time with Ingrid. Ingrid now lives with Jayden and his family and is working at Amazon as a picker. She has also recently gotten a second job at a local restaurant called Cheddars in their To Go area. We continue to encourage her to take her hairstyling certification tests and utilize that degree she earned. We went through a rough patch with Ingrid from spring until recently. She is starting to take responsibility, and we hope as she continues to mature she will make good decisions. 

Special Christmastime with friends

I have made some special friendships and connections with people at the Cancer Centers of America and so grateful for the experiences and all of the opportunities I have had there this year. I attended a special Christmas celebration and the Cancer Center in downtown Phoenix. It was a beautiful night. We then hosted a small gathering at our house and enjoyed a chili dinner, white elephant gift exchange, desert, cookie decorating, and gingerbread house decorating. I am so grateful for these special relationships!

Thanksgiving 2022

This Thanksgiving, we invited a few friends from CTCA, my Uncle John who just moved here from CA, Sandra, Ingrid, Mom, and Dad. It was my Dad's birthday so we enjoyed celebrating his special day. Juan was off of work and decided to participate since Sandra was coming. We made all of our traditional favorites and had a nice time. This was the start of some reconciliation with Ingrid since she moved out and Juan and Sandra even helped us decorate the tree after everyone left for the evening.

Stroke Camp at Northern Arizona University

Kay Wing, the founder of my rehab center (SWAN Rehab), is also very active with the physical and occupational education doctorate program at NAU. Many years ago, Kay and several professors at the college started a stroke camp to help both stroke survivors and PHD students. It is a great opportunity for students to get real life practice and survivors to get inexpensive therapy. I had the opportunity to attend this 3 day camp back in 2008 before we adopted the kids. I decided to try and raise money for scholarships for the camp during May and October Stroke Awareness months and was successful in raising $1675. The camp was a great experience and I enjoyed meeting both students and new stroke survivors. I had the opportunity to share my book and story on the last day and encourage the students in their future careers. My therapists have helped me so much and I would never be where I am today in my recovery or independence without Kay and my other therapists. I wanted these future therapists to know how important there job is and that some of there patients will depend on them for physical help, mental help, and use them as their social outlet. I know at times, SWAN Rehab served as all three for me during my recovery.

Halloween 2022

 As we are entering our empty nesting phase of life, Halloween is a different occasion without kids to carve pumpkins with, buy expensive costumes for, go trick-or-treating with, or even argue with! We did purchase a pumpkin and Dainis graciously posed for me. We set up in our driveway with our popcorn machine on Halloween night and passed out fresh popcorn and candy. It was the first time we have done this since Covid, and it was good to see the neighbors. The dogs, although not terribly excited, did participate in the costumes.

Book Signing Events

I am so thankful for all the opportunities I have had since my book published in March to share our story. I have found great success in using book signing events as a marketing tool to meet new people and connect with others. At every event, I have a raffle drawing for a free gift card for those who sign up for my website and monthly newsletter. This way, I am making connections and gathering emails, even if they don't purchase my book. I had the opportunity to do some events in May for Stroke Awareness Month but then also did additional book signings at the end of October for World Stroke Day (October 29th). I also pass out postcards that tell my story and information on signs of a stroke. I want people to be aware because I was not when I had mine at age 29.  I am always looking for new opportunities to share my story and look forward to future events.

Women's Retreat

I was so blessed with the opportunity to be able to attend our women's retreat again this year and see our guest speaker in person once again, Carol Kent. Carol is an amazing woman, author, speaker, and founder of the "Speak Up" writers and speakers conference. I have been able to attend Speak Up twice now virtually and Carol graciously endorsed my first book. I met her in person for the first time at my speaker conference in TX in July and was so excited to see her again. I had the opportunity to ride to camp with two dear friends, Nancy from church and Onjalai from CTCA. We had a great weekend together, and I even tried archery with Nancy's help! 

Pinetop

We have really enjoyed our trips to Pinetop and love having our own little place we can go with the dogs. Every time we go, the landscape is a little different and the renovations at our favorite lake (Woodland Lake) are complete. They redid all the asphalt on the paths so they are wider now and the lake is now full. They continue to add new playground equipment, and it is a great environment for everyone. Dainis loves to go to the different antique stores and check out the best deals, and we have our favorite restaurants. We usually do take out and enjoy eating at home with the dogs. We are set up outside on our little porch with a table and chairs and small propane firepit so when it is nice, we can eat outside. We even purchased a used gas grill so we can cook out!

Abilities Expo

 We have never attended the Abilities Expo, held in Scottsdale, but decided to go this year to find out more about service dogs. We learned some new things and got some good contacts. I also had the opportunity to meet a fellow stroke survivor named Christopher Ewing. Chris is from CA and is actually a tv producer. He owns his own green room and equipment and when he had his stroke, he decided to use his resources to start helping other stroke survivors. He teamed up with Abilities Expo to be the voice of stroke and started a Stroke TV channel along with a podcast. I would love to be on his podcast at some point and was glad I had the opportunity to meet him in person.

Juan's Job

 Juan continues to work at La Loma Assistive Living, which is a part of Sun Health. We are very proud of him for his dedication and the responsibility he has shown there. He has a tenure of over two years and they continue to promote him in both position and salary. He started out as a part-time dishwasher. He was then trained as an expeditor. He is now a cook. Because he is trained in all three areas, he is quite valuable to them in the kitchen and can jump into any of those roles at any time. As he looks towards high school and technical school graduation with his Coding degree, we are encouraging him to consider the full-time employment options at Sun Health in their IT department. Although he is also looking at college options, using his technical degree, working first, and maturing some first may be a better choice right now.

Juan's First Day of His Senior Year

Juan is not super excited to take pictures unless you get him on a good day so the idea of getting a first day of school picture didn't work so well. Although communication and our relationship isn't as smooth as we would like it to be, we continue to do all the same things we have always done. I have always celebrated special events in the kids' lives like the first day of school, the last day of school, holidays, birthdays, and special achievements. Not only was I brought up with a mom that also went out of her way to always make things special, but I feel like my kids never had this type of love and so if I can make up for lost time, I try to do all I can to show them we care. I hope one day they will look back and realize how hard we really did try. Sadly, their challenges started way before coming to our family and we were just not enough to solve them because they weren't willing to accept the help and guidance we could give them.

An Amazing Speaking Conference

Since I started on this writing journey in winter 2021, I have had the opportunity to attend quite a few wonderful virtual conferences and always learn a lot. When I first heard about Christian Communicators Speakers Conference from a friend in my writer's tribe, I was immediately drawn to it because it is based in TX. I reached out to one of the co-directors and she endorsed my book and supported me before I even signed up for the conference. So, I was very excited to attend for multiple reasons. I was going back to TX, would have the chance to reunite with good friends again, would have the chance to meet authors and speakers I had only met virtually up until now, and I would finally be attending my first in-person conference. It was a wonderful experience and I learned a lot. I made some amazing new friends that I continue to keep in touch with today. I walked away with new headshots that I love and a 3 minute video reel. I am excited for the opportunity to go back again this year and look forward to continue learning and gaining additional speaking skills.

Juan's 18th Birthday!

 Juan celebrated his 18th birthday while we were in TX. At the time we planned the trip, which was a year in advance, he was set to stay with a friend. As the trip neared, those plans fell threw and our communication with Juan sadly continued to diminish. We tried to take him out and celebrate him before leaving, but he was not interested so we left his presents and requested cheesecake for him and he celebrated alone. We have learned so much on this adoption journey and about abandonment, trauma, and mental challenges. There was so much we were unprepared for, and we truly just wanted to love, support, and give kids a forever home that might not have that chance. The fallacy in that was that we were not adequately prepared to deal with all the challenges that came our way and could not get the kids to accept the help they needed to heal. We hope as Juan and his siblings continue to mature and grow into adults, they will make their own way successfully and find the help they need.